Well tough, because I'm going to go ahead and do just that.
I have lots more but I think that will do for now. I believe I promised a certain snake story last time, so I'm sure you're all on the edge of your seats with anticipation.
In the villa, Daf and I stay on the basement floor which is a nicely arranged area with a bedroom and a bathroom and sliding doors which lead out onto a patio and then down to the swimming pool. There are two sliding doors, the main one which is kept open most of the day to help keep it cool, and then a secondary sliding net/door type thing which keeps out all the creepy crawlies (so that one is obviously kept closed, except when you have to get outside). We had been out into the village for a wander around and a drink, and when we got back my Dad went downstairs to open the main sliding door. A few minutes later Daf and I went down, and I looked across and noticed a long lizardy head and neck poking out from inbetween the anti-insect door and the main door. I looked at it for a moment, and then I pointed at it and said, "Daf, is that a snake?" Initially he thought I meant the toggle for the blinds which was on the floor and rolled his eyes, but when he actually saw where I was pointing he said, "Oh that! Yeah, that's a snake." So I shouted up to my Dad that there was a snake in the doorway, which my poor mother was horrified by, as she's not what I would call a 'snake lover'. She came downstairs and shut the main door so that at least it couldn't get inside (which I didn't have the initiative to do - I'm so good in a crisis).
We didn't know if it was poisonous or not, and we couldn't risk it getting inside, so my Dad put his trainers on and went to get a spade. He went around the oustide and opened the anti-insect door, at which point the snake flipped out and went shooting off across the patio and through the holes in the laundry basket. It was super fast but Dad managed to catch it and unfortunately had to kill it.
Realistically it must have only been about three foot long as it had to fit in the gap between the doors, so it wasn't a huge snake. However in my memory it looks something like this:
So there you go, that's my exciting snake story. You're welcome.